Ena logidrio

Posa girizoun sto mialo mou, kai posa alla stin kardia mou. Blekonte metaksi tous, den afinoun to oti orizei tin pragmatikotita mou na anapneusei isoropia.

Na dextw tin kardia mou san tin alitheia mou? An tin akousw isws na min ekana tipota apo ola afta. Isws kai na kathomoun na me trigisei afth. Na min prostatepsw tipota gia tin periptwsi pou isws ponesw anepanorthota an me pligwsei. Poso pithano einai na ponesw toso? Den kserw katholou. Tora pou kathome edo kserw oti tha mou prosfere mono tromero agxos tora.
Giati otan den zw griniazw kai otan zw fovame?

Isws na dextw tin adraneia mou kai na min piesw tipota. Den tha anteksw kai poli etsi omws. Tha me anagasw na psaksw kati, perisotero pros ofelos tis eikonas mou pros tous allous.

Poia einai h eikona mou gia emena se afti tin stigmi? Exo kanei lathos me tin deuteri. Alla an den to ekana den tha eixa tin prwti xtes. Isws na tin eixa argotera, dikeologo gia na mou tin pw.
Eimai mikros kai amathitos, den thaprepe na kserw pio polla tora?
Oso ksodeuome etsi, toso ftanw se mia psixri pragmatikotita opou prepei na prostateuome apo ta panta, kai tipota den tha einai to idio meta. Ti me noiazei? Pali na ependisw sto swsto?
Arage afta pou mas lene san sofies einai pragmata pou prepei na akolouthisoume h pragmata pou prepei na testaroume gia ton eauto mas. An isxiei oti prepei prwta na dokimaseis kati gia na to katalaveis, tote h sofia den exei kamia aksia, para mono na mas gemisei to queue me pragmata pou prepei na kanoume.

Tora giati ponaw? Giati niwthw agxos oti tha kanw polla lathi mazi. H oti exo kanei lathi mazi. Giati na min euxaristithw ta lathi kai oti ginei? Ti einai to xeirotero pou borei na ginei? Den exo dikeoma na peksw se afto to epipedo tis logikis? Eklogikeuw gia na ksekolisw apotin logiki:
tha pw oti den thelw tin deuteri kai tha stenaxorithei. to xeirotero tha pw psemmata ta opoia argotera tha emfanistoun kai tha tis dwsoun ena logo na pei poso malakas eimai, kai afto tha to mathei para polis kosmos kai meta polloi tha einai aftoi pou den tha theloun na me doun. Tha me krinoun prin me gnwrisoun. Afto ginete etsi kai alliws omws.
Tha tin pligwsw xwris logo, epidi epeza to paixnidi mou. Ginete alliws omws? Boro na peksw pexnidia ta opoia fenete kai mou lene oti exo tosi anagi na peksw xwris na pligwsw kanenan? Giati niwthw toses tipseis gia aftin? Einai gia aftin h einai gia mena? Gia to xasimo tis opoias athootitas mou. Gia to ligisma twn opoiwn aksiwn mou? As borousa na metousiosw tin pargmatiki aksia aftou tou sinesthimatos gia aftin tin deuteri se kati allo, olokliromena. Na borousa na to metafrasw xwris logia se kati allo kai na to kratisw ekei. Omws afto to sinesthima, ena krama sarkas kai tipsewn, reziliki kai fovou, periergias, kavlas kai tromou gia tin agnwsti stigmi. Foros timis ston orismo twn perithoriwn mas.

Oti me sibiknwnei erxete apo ton tromo oti ola borei na allaksoun toso wste na min boro na protimw to stathero kai sigouro. Kai h periptwsi tis epekeimenis apolitis katatastrofis tis zwtikotitas mou, h pithani eksailosi mou apo osa me trivelizoun. Sakoules me skoupidia pou exoun skistei kai egw kolibaw mesa sta aposinthemena apomeinaria twn anthropwn ta opoia exo mazepsei.
Mesa se ola afta kapou den prepei na einai h iremia? Isoropia. Sigouria gia mia poreia, einai mono tifli apofasi? Dinami na iparxw nomima me olous, kai as min teriazw pouthena. Dikeoma stin iparksi mou! Den thelei na ponesei alla den arkei na kathete sto argo krio.